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Post by Baloo on Oct 17, 2003 9:29:00 GMT -5
Is it just me or does anyone else feel that parents are trying to hard to be 'friends' with their kids instead of parents these days? Hell my parents were nice to me, but they were in no way my best friends. My parents new how to bring down that whip when needed ! Then again, maybe parents are befriending their kids because we have a lot more 'kids' having kids these days .
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Post by Tammi on Oct 17, 2003 14:44:09 GMT -5
I've always had more of a "friend" relationship with Jake than mother/child. Maybe it's because I was just a kid when I had him, so I kind of "grew up" with him. With Josh, I was 23, and had parenting experience, so I have more of a "parent" relationship with him.
Now, with Jake being a grown married man, it's even more of a friendship, because I cant really "parent" him anymore.
Does that make sense?
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Post by db69 on Oct 17, 2003 16:06:48 GMT -5
I think that Tammi hit the nail on the head - The 'friendship' has a lot to do with the age of the parents (mental age as well as physical age). I think I have more of a friendship with my son (he's 16), but I also know when I need to put that friendship aside and be Dad.
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Post by BigMelt on Oct 24, 2003 14:39:27 GMT -5
Not a problem for me. I don't think my kids even LIKE me all the time, much less want to be my friends.... ©Ø But seriously - I would love to be friends with my kids, but it's not a priority. Maybe it's the military background (Just call me Major Dad), but I'm strict. My wife sometimes thinks I'm too strict. That's OK, I think she's too easy. My deal is I set rules. When they break the rules they will get in trouble. I come off as strict when all I'm trying to be is consistent. They will always know what they're going to get with me. I do try to balance it, though. I will hold them to high standards, but do everything I can to help them reach those standards. I will be strict and keep their nose to the grind stone when it's time to "work". But come "Happy Fun Time", I'm the funnest there is. Of course, I may just be Red from That 70's Show and only THINK I'm fun, but what can ya' do?
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Post by Tammi on Nov 20, 2003 9:03:18 GMT -5
you can be both, if you do it right.
you just gotta learn when to be a parent and when to be a friend.
takes years of practice.
but by the time Kid #2 comes along
you usually have it down to a science
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Post by ladynred on Nov 20, 2003 9:34:24 GMT -5
The difference is.....
Parents can be "friends" to their kids in certain circumstances, and at certain ages....
I believe what Baloo is referring to though, is when parents are so scared to offend their kids and therefore be "hated" that they allow themselves to be WALKED on....
Yes?
(that is a HUGE pet peeve of mine.... )
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Post by Baloo on Nov 20, 2003 9:36:17 GMT -5
sactly' ;D
While they're in the house, you're their parent. Once they leave, be all the friend you can be ;D ;D ;D
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Post by ladynred on Nov 20, 2003 9:50:37 GMT -5
Growing up, I thought my parents were devil's spawns. AND GUESS WHAT?? THEY DIDNT GIVE A SHIT WHAT I THOUGHT!!! They knew what they were doing, and acted on good faith that one day, I would grow to appreciate their techniques...
I did.
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Post by Baloo on Nov 20, 2003 13:27:31 GMT -5
Growing up, I thought my parents were devil's spawns. AND GUESS WHAT?? THEY DIDNT GIVE A SHIT WHAT I THOUGHT!!! They knew what they were doing, and acted on good faith that one day, I would grow to appreciate their techniques... I did. I agree. Although now, the DR's put my mom on so many drugs, she can't be anyone's friend. Sept' maybe the man on the FING moon
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Post by ladynred on Nov 20, 2003 15:28:31 GMT -5
What is wrong with your mom, baloo?
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Post by Baloo on Nov 20, 2003 15:34:30 GMT -5
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Post by ladynred on Nov 20, 2003 15:58:46 GMT -5
Oh man.... that sucks. Sorry balooey....
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Post by Baloo on Nov 20, 2003 15:59:43 GMT -5
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Post by ladynred on Nov 20, 2003 16:21:32 GMT -5
I hear that.....
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Post by Wats on Nov 20, 2003 21:32:01 GMT -5
I am so not a friend to my kids. We act silly and have fun together but I crack the whip a lot. My kids just started getting to stay up passed 8:30 a few years ago. Ive always kept them on a strict schedule all their lives and I think it helps them feel more secure.
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